co-existing at work and otherwise

At work few freshers have joined as trainees, who are allocated different mentors. As most of today's generation goes (of course I talk like a granny, but get my gist, I am talking about a whooping 8 year difference between basic schooling) youngsters are inquisitive, energetic, full of enthusiasm. To me its a great defense mechanism because, at a place when you are daunted by what may come ahead and the pressure of being inexperienced, these very qualities help you learn and progress. But us experienced lot who are burdened by the rut, find these very qualities annoying. The smart newbee with do-you-enjoy-your-work queries becomes an added burden, because you realize you have stopped asking that question. Some mentors who are harsh enough, immediately snub the spark and tell them to mind their business i.e. be a submissive junior who doesnt ask but does what he/she is told and talks when required. 

Of course at work one has to learn to restrict one's curiosity. One learns such things gradually, by knowing when and how. That's being corporate.

But is it ok to curb someone's natural enthusiasm ?

I don't get this. Are we humans so un(or dis?)compassionate to forget what it is like to be a novice at something ? or are we simply not ready to accept that its ok if someone is different from us ? Why do we want to force others to be as we want them to be ? Why does a delhi wala think mumbai wala can't be like him or vice versa ?

Of course we eventually learn to co-exist. But my common sense tells me to learn and respect the differences and then be what you are. Banter is all right but ridiculing or condescending someone for being themselves is kind of tacky.

~nightflier

P.S. After living with chinese room-mates for 6 months, I don't forget to tell anyone that sometimes the smells of food can be overpowering and totally unrelatable and how communication can be a problem. I am sure they must have felt the same way. That our spices are too strong, and Indians talk 
faster than a bullet! :D
P.P.S. When I become a mentor I hope I have some great materical to dazzle the newbee :D

the art of Fun ;)

Yeah! I met the most fun people, after eons.


Here!



I loved the lil jig at the beginning! It sets the right mood. Oh and dont even get me started on the music!
And man who had ever thought that brides' maids and best men could be so hip and cool ?
No, I am not analysing the video :P
Just that I am overwhelmed by its coolness quotient ;)


And the bestest part of the video (of course according to me) starts at 3.36.
Fantasy world eh ? 


Whoever the couple is, I am glad I met them.
Some dream wedding you guys had :)


Thanks u-tube :D


~nightflier

notes to random people

Was out whole day for St. Patrick's day celebrations! Chicago river colouring, the downtown Irish parade, warm and friendly people from neighbouring states and some personal take-a-ways!


1. Never keep anyone waiting. You might be a girl who wants to look her best for an Irish event (not me yaa) on a particularly chilly and windy day. But do value others time. Not everyone is fond of becoming a kulfi!


2. Group dynamics are difficult. Its difficult to keep everyone together, in sync, on the same plane during an outing. Specially in an international community where conversing in your mother tongue (which no one else understands) can be quite awkward, discomforting, annoying and sometimes offensive. And this one applies to me too, as sometimes to soothe people from my country in case of a debate/dispute, I use Hindi. Sigh..


3. Planning without communication is as good as not planning at all. Anyways things are going to be random. Then why even bother ? So dear friend, next time you want people to follow an agenda to maximize fun, participation etc, communicate!


4. Don't judge others because they did not laugh at your jokes :P May be they are really dumb or may be you are. God knows. So lets stop trying!


5. And cross cultural sensitivity is something about which I can go on and on. Sometimes even I dont realize, any harmless comment can be taken quite literally and personally. Its advisable to keep things simple. After all being a global citizen is in itself quite tough!


Moral of the story: I can be quite a mean person when instigated ;)

For moms who stitch :)

As roomies we often talk about our parents. And specially mothers and their quirks. This time me and roomie found out a real dear and common connection with our moms.


My mom loves to stitch. A lot.
And her Singer fashion maker (the one at home looks a bit different) sits on top of the gadget/machine lists she is too fond of. That might be the only one actually, if the grinder/mixer/food processor in the kitchen is not considered. Also the TV remote, control over which she would very generously never claim! I guess after me and bro not being there at home for almost 5-6 years now, has she gotten used to the notion of having the control over the remote control. Well I attribute it to her sweetness and slightly more intellectual, other pursuits like reading. And if we are talking about computers, after much poking from our end, she now writes me really sweet e-mails, and skypes with me once in a while.


Though I digressed, it was important to give an idea about her inclinations. And that is why I find it really amusing, when she gets sentimental about her sewing machine. It is like her 3rd child. Or may be the best friend ? Who has helped her produce cute bags, curtains, table cloths, pretty tops and what not. And now sadly I realize I don't have anything hand (or machine in this case)  stitched by her. I do have a scarf, but that too got torn cos of my mis-handling :-/


As for me, I know I will never be that creative on the stitching front, except for some life saving, really sloppy stitching tricks. But what I am sure is, my kids will talk about my internet presence when they grow up ;)


This one is for the moms who stitch :)


~nightflier

superwoman on the prowl

There was a lull in the air after the exams. Everything was at a standstill, me being licensed to procrastinate now.

So the day started on the same dull note, with clever me smartly setting traps for the examstricken poor me. To get into the groove I had promised the roomie to go for an early morning shopping escapade and had soaked some sprouts to awaken the cooking creativity. Shopping got cancelled and sprouts turned out to be boring too. I turned my attentions to Gregory House. 2 episodes down and I could feel things kicking in.

And thus the superwoman was unleashed. This is what she did to achieve the super-stardom.

i. Invited 2 friends for lunch. This meant cooking and of course entertaining them, setting out dishes, washing utensils afterwards etc.

ii. Self grooming session. This involved first hair cut in the US of A. It was a pretty dull experience, but had a 'good hair day' afterwards. Exactly what I wanted. 

iii. Roamed around the Devon avenue (Indian street) and bought some groceries.

iv. Travelled back alone. This involved a bus ride beside a creepy woman. :|

v. Another big round of monthly grocery shopping. This involved lifting bags totally unsuitable to my structure :D

vi. Did laundry.

vii. Arranged all groceries.

viii. Relaxed a bit with a looong shower.

ix. Made favorite dinner of dosa-chutney. The filler this time was chana masala. Nice combo :)

x. Cleaned the kitchen after all the mess.

xi. Threw all the after exam trash. Arranged stuff in order and put them in respective files.

xii. Searched for all the bills and settled bills on billmonk.

xiii. Replied to all the pending mails. Social networking accomplished!

xiv. Now writing a blog about it. (just to show off the superwoman powers :P)

On some days I just ask myself 'why ????' while on days like these I feel like 'Impossible is nothing!'

signing off,

your friendly neighborhood ;)

~nightlfier!

lost in the crowd

She was raised in a small conservative family. She got married at an early age and moved to a big city. She always had those dreamy wings which she cut off for marriage, family and her children. She gave up a part of her independence to enable her children to be better poeple. Over the years with truckloads of responsibilities she lost touch with herself.

Today I met her at a shop. I was waiting outside the fitting room for my friend to come out. ThereI saw her coming in with 3 dresses in hand. She nodded at me. I smiled back and tried to trace her. After a while she came outside wearing one of the dresses, her eyes searching for someone's approval. It seemed her rebellious little daughter had ran off to the hip corner of the store to check out the season's new arrivals. Her disappointed empty gaze returned to me. 

I nodded back, my eyes saying 'You look nice'. 

Her smile said 'thank you'.

I think we made each other's day today.

~nightflier