Standing up

Letting evil thrive : 

from here

I am thinking about the numerous times I have ignored guys (sometimes guy-friends) indulging in blatant objectification of women. I also have close guy-friends using the term 'RAPE' lightly around women. I have ignored that too. Instead of ignoring I think I could have spoken up and shown my irritation/anger over such objectionable behavior. Of course, saying all such talkers are repressed psychopaths is a harsh judgement but not taking anything related to RAPE or women's respect and privacy and space seriously, seems even more judgmental to myself.

I hope we make topics of taboo a point of discussion. I hope no girl sees her any weaker. I hope sexuality is not repressed but willingly accepted. I hope families treat girls and boys as equal. I hope boys are taught to respect women and their space by example. 

I hope the victims heal. But we as people heal better and faster.

I hope we become more proactive and thus have the need to be less reactive.

co-existing at work and otherwise

At work few freshers have joined as trainees, who are allocated different mentors. As most of today's generation goes (of course I talk like a granny, but get my gist, I am talking about a whooping 8 year difference between basic schooling) youngsters are inquisitive, energetic, full of enthusiasm. To me its a great defense mechanism because, at a place when you are daunted by what may come ahead and the pressure of being inexperienced, these very qualities help you learn and progress. But us experienced lot who are burdened by the rut, find these very qualities annoying. The smart newbee with do-you-enjoy-your-work queries becomes an added burden, because you realize you have stopped asking that question. Some mentors who are harsh enough, immediately snub the spark and tell them to mind their business i.e. be a submissive junior who doesnt ask but does what he/she is told and talks when required. 

Of course at work one has to learn to restrict one's curiosity. One learns such things gradually, by knowing when and how. That's being corporate.

But is it ok to curb someone's natural enthusiasm ?

I don't get this. Are we humans so un(or dis?)compassionate to forget what it is like to be a novice at something ? or are we simply not ready to accept that its ok if someone is different from us ? Why do we want to force others to be as we want them to be ? Why does a delhi wala think mumbai wala can't be like him or vice versa ?

Of course we eventually learn to co-exist. But my common sense tells me to learn and respect the differences and then be what you are. Banter is all right but ridiculing or condescending someone for being themselves is kind of tacky.

~nightflier

P.S. After living with chinese room-mates for 6 months, I don't forget to tell anyone that sometimes the smells of food can be overpowering and totally unrelatable and how communication can be a problem. I am sure they must have felt the same way. That our spices are too strong, and Indians talk 
faster than a bullet! :D
P.P.S. When I become a mentor I hope I have some great materical to dazzle the newbee :D

The mummer's trick

The other day, brother came home pretty distraught. He had witnessed an accident. No one was hurt but what happened at the site was thought-worthy. An auto driver dashed an innova. The lanky auto driver pretty much shaken and in a fit of revenge parked his vehicle and got out. The innova back door opened and a very decent (read educated and rich) looking fellow got out. Then rained a shower of punches and kicks on the auto driver. No one went to help the auto driver, not even anyone from his brotherhood.

Part 2 of the story was witnessed by me. On my way to office, there was a road block and 2 cars were parked on the side. They had hit each other. Outside was standing a group of sophisticated middle aged men and women and they were politely discussing the damages done. Not a single shout or a raised hand.

I can just remember lines from A Clash of Kings.



Varys says, 'Power resides where men believe it resides. No more no less.'
Lord Tyrion says (agitated), 'So power is a mummer's trick?'

~nightflier

it must matter, no ?

So today I was thinking, when Independence did happen, in India with all the historic preludes and struggles, what was the common man doing ? No, no it did not arise out of some deep philosophical quest for answers. Neither do I want to sound un-patriotic or raise fingers on anyone’s patriotic duty. I am just intrigued. Follows why.


I was reading some stuff on osama, the politician’s version , the military’s version and all that jazz. What must the common man in Pakistan be thinking ? I am sure with all the instability in and outside (read surrounding) the country life must be difficult as hell. With what random bombings and other such disturbances, what must be the thoughts in his head ? relief or panic ? or does it really matter ?


I can never physically witness (or be part of) what went on when we were fighting for freedom and independence. And as Tyler has put it rather revolutionarily, that’s the saddest truth of our generation, that we have nothing to fight for except ourselves and our individuality (and this I state is my assessment of his words, with my limited capabilities). So does it even matter when a guy whom you have been trying to track down for 10 years, drops dead suddenly, in your arms ? (oh, I don't condone what happened on 26/11 and 9/11. Don’t be so judgmental!)


The common man only cares about his safety and 2 time ka khana (daily meals). Must be the (rather sad?) reality of our times.
Oh and yes, I am not sure if what follows will make anything any better or worse. And I also hope, Tyles is wrong and we do find something worth throwing our lives for, why not individually ?


~nightflier

a little pilgrimage

Since the 4 of us (family) are hardly together, the moment brother announced his around new year's eve trip, we planned a little excursion to Shegaon (the karmabhumi of Gajanan Maharaj)


My views/thoughts about god are still evolving. Or so I think. And I have strictly no opinions about any religion. It always fails me why people get so instigated. To each his own I say, but then life/world would be too simple and there won't be any fun. For some. Anywhoo I digress.


What caught my eye the moment I stepped in the temple premises was the simplicity, the tidiness and the discipline. The darshan was arranged in such a way that it causes least problems to the bhakt. Even the wait in the queues (which are extremely well organized) seems easygoing on special days (like thursdays, weekends and public holidays). 


Later baba (dad) and mama (mom's brother) told us that the Sansthan (organization) which takes care of all the temple related activities has remained free of politics for the past 100 years and more (since the time it came into being). So the management remains less cluttered. Everyone is given an equal opportunity as a visitor. There is no VIP treatment given to anyone. I think that is a win-win. When people know there is no option but to wait in the queues, patience and discipline don't remain obligatory. Moreover the sevaks (volunteers) who work there for free are people from nearby villages, who come there in groups and are trained. They are really polite, patient and helpful. Even the food that is served to the bhakt/visitors is made everyday on a fresh basis with no (its not an understatement) mess anywhere. The plates that we were served in and the vessels that we were served from were impeccably clean (From whatever my eyes could catch from the distance). The coupon, serving and sitting system are so efficient that there are hardly any questions to be raised. Even about the food quality. The entire transactions of the Sansthan run on a no profit-no loss basis, so costs for anything and everything are so less that the trip doesn't end up being a financial burden for the common man.


I was mighty impressed with all these facts streaming in. So its not that difficult to run an efficient organization on the basis of good values and with the help of people. This can definitely form a really great case study for management students. From where many of our administrators can also learn. May be. :)


~nightflier

:-O :-O

read this as a friend's status on facebook!!!!!


"India is poor but Indians are not poor" says one of the Swiss bank directors. 
He says that "280 Lac Crore" of Indian money is deposited in Swiss banks which can be used for 'tax less' budget for 30 yrs. Can give 60 crore jobs to all Indians. From any village to Delhi 4 lane roads. Forever free power supply to more than 500 social projects. Every citizen can get monthly 2000/- for 60 yrs.


I guess its time for us to become the super power that we are tauted as!


~nightflier

On domestic violence

Recently while reading Stieg Larsson's Millennium Trilogy which was based around crimes of domestic violence, physical and mental abuse I was quite inspired to write about the whole issue. Thinking that I would spoil the plot for potential readers I did not go ahead. But after reading Neha's article I am more than inspired to write. I would definitely be referencing to the book, but would try to be indirect and subtle.


Violence as a means of self defense is the only way I can justify it. In any other form its outright evil and cruel. And the trend of violence exists in every society. It has got nothing to do with 'oh we are old fashioned in India and hence its an Indian thing'. Good and bad examples exist in every society. Its the psychology behind such acts that needs to be studied and tackled.


The person committing the abhorring acts of hitting, torturing, sexually abusing another person is misguided by the sense of control which they need to display. I think these acts of controlling others, displaying dominance are attitude problems. Its a disease. And as every disease, it needs diagnosis and medicine. The only diagnosis I can think of is the victims stop being victimized. If the victims start retaliating or start giving subtle hints in extreme cases, then help can be sought. The day a person who is being victimized for such acts asks the question 'WHY ?' the day half the problem is solved. Because with that why comes a revelation that its unjust to tolerate such appalling things. According to me it applies to physical acts of violation to mental harassments like abusive relationships. I really dont understand when people start blaming situations and dont want to get out of bad relationships. My logical brain says if one of the 2 persons in the relationship is not getting respect then its time to get it done with. Though I would admit that things aren't so simple in reality. I myself know a few friends who are in bad relationships. One could get out of it with substantial emotional hurt but the other could not. 


This is where Lisbeth Salander comes into picture. Despite having the physique of a teenager, she gets around bad, abusive relationships using her intelligence and skills. In her book there is no mercy for hideous crimes. If you are exploiting someone's vulnerability she makes sure you get punished. No she wont break the law or she wont kill you or she wont even do some superheroish stunt. She would simply put you in a trying situation where you would remember all the gods you prayed to (dadi-nani yaad dilana types). When everyone else in the system fails to act, she takes care of stuff in her own style. I know all this makes me sound like a childish hero worshiper, but the point I am trying to make is most of the times we underestimate ourselves. Sometimes even a loud whimper can mend ways for the abuser and the abused. The courage needs to be summed up.


A huge salute to the Lisbeth Salander's amongst us. And a pat on the back to the ones who are suffering and don't find the courage to retaliate. I am damn sure one day you guys would find it!


~nightflier

on cricket, sports etc

Its 2.20 pm in the watch. The day before an exam/interview/first date always seems to go on forever.


Again a look at the watch. Its just 2.23. Unbelievable! Sadly all the daily chores are done with. Its going to be a long day. One opens a newspaper website out of (boredom ?)


The first thing one comes across is the appalling spot fixing stuff. One isn't a religious fanatic when it comes to cricket. But one knows how much the country one belongs to is affected by such stuff. Integrity must be a myth for some people, one thinks. Must be sad for those involved. Last one heard the country was in floods, before that the infiltration and terrorism, before that the anarchy. Desperation one thinks. Must be stretching them to such extents. But what about the believers ? Isn't it a circle of life. The believer believes, the believed delivers/performs. They are kind of self fulfilling prophecy for each other. With even one weak link in the chain, it can break. Sometimes it can be welded. At other times its just a broken chain, with a great story of belief behind it.


Then one listens to SRT's interview online. One thanks god for him. Integrity doesn't seem a myth anymore. Its a legacy one has to learn about and carry forward.


Its 2.46 in the watch now. One has successfully eluded sleep. And one can get back to more meaningful work. After all when it comes to cricket and sports in India sometimes pretending to be oblivious to some obvious stuff, is the best remedy to avoid cynicism.


~nightflier

Always an Indian

Read Priya Ramani's article a long time ago (when it got published i.e.). Though people ripped her apart on twitter for being so open about her judgemental opinions, I had mixed feelings about it. 


And then Great Bong published this. Which I think is a really amazing post. He doesnt throw bricks at anyone but so aptly puts his point across.


Both articles are thought provoking. But I agree more with the latter for its democratic stance.
On a personal note, I think people everywhere are basically the same. Culture, surroundings, situations set apart their identities. May be. After all it always boils down to the conundrum of existence and identity, which is very individual to every existence. I am running in circles here, aint I ?


~nightflier

Tit for Tat

We humans are strangely social. In being so we also remain private. We build homes. With strong foundations. And we guard them fiercely, like our own private, tiny little space in the expanse of the universe, ignoring the fact that other people are eyeing our little world.

That sadly makes us a lot vulnerable. There are some twisted minds who think, they can terrorise others, out of a sick interest of ruling mankind.

What else can be the reasoning behind Pune blasts ?

Pune has been my second home, a place I love cos I have really grown up there, and I hate the blame games that have started after all this carnage.

First the cowards attack our home and then instead of trying to protect it more or protect other possible targets, we are getting involved in a blame game, which normally has no outcome. Life's just going in circles. This is what the home ministry did after the Mumbai blasts. Agreed you cannot check each and every bag pack in the city. Agreed the city is a host to a lot of outsiders. Agreed it is one of the fastest growing cosmopolitan (the 2nd tier cities). And we still sit anticipating attacks ? Aren't people inside the country itself doing enough to divide it ? Or may be we are getting really good at it, throwing away our vulnerable, weak spots and letting others exploit it. What now ? Army raj ?

This is so hopeless. Terrorism is becoming an organized crime. Or as Pritish Nandy said in his tweet a growing business ? Come on, I am not naive enough to think that there are no insiders involved in this. To attack my house, you need to know its exact weak spots and for that only an insider can help you. How about tracking down these links first ? How about making sure that such dastardly acts or even attempts are met with grave consequences. This has become all the more important now, because of the growing aloofness about such incidents amongst aam junta. We are the largest democracy in the world and not some nation ruled by chimps. Whoever did all this, our intelligence, politicians and system failed us. Lets not forget that either.

We have a long role to play in the coming days. Lets not make our tolerance our Achilles heel. Lets make our shield stronger and give these losers a Tit for Tat.

~nightflier

This is your chance!

At the age of 84 people are normally supposed to go senile, worried about the mahabharat show they are going to miss because of grandson's unexpected hijacking of the remote control and the subsequent discussion they are going to miss out during the morning walk, with other fellow members of the fraternity. But then there is certain someone by the name of Bal Thackrey who is crying foul against people in general because his own family life is in shackles and because his maid wont serve him that delicious pizza from Pizza Hut (apparently a multinational chain run by a North Indian).

Talk about utter cheap-giri. So much that it has caused a pretty laid back person like me to write stuff down!

Ab tak to J&K kisska (India ka, Pakistan ka ya J&K ke logon ka) ye sawaal tha, aur ab ye bemuraad insaan ne naya bakheda khada kar diya hai, Mumbai Kiski ?

As if life was not hard, frustrating and stupid (read everything related to the Kasab case) enough!

Dude, I am telling you (also includes certain someone related to you, by the name of Raj) none of us have much time on this planet (and this existence actually does not make sense), so try to enjoy that extra cheese wala Pizza and marvel at the simple delights and pleasures of life. Stop bugging people. Sachin, Ambanis, APJ, SRK might have a lot of patience. But normal people like me, we no likey this divide and rule stuff. 

What makes Mumbai so easy going is its vicissitude. Its capacity to absorb people, its ability to give everyone a chance (that sadly includes you) .

So count this one and please live and let live.

~nightflier

P.S. I have been taught to be respectful to elder people, I guess I did not cross any line :P

J.E.R.S.E.Y. boys

There is so much I dont know about music! Bah!


Experienced Broadway musicals for the first time yesterday! And boy what an experience!
So thrilled I am, that I have to blog about it. To share it with you. And if you are not much of a fan of musicals/theatre or have not experienced it, then to urge you all to please please try it. At least once! 


To start off, Jersey Boys is a musical about the most famous American pop and rock band The Four Seasons. It tells the story of a class act, some pure musical genius and talent, in the form of Frankie Valli (the lead Italian singer with an I and not a Y), Tommy De Vito (the leader), Nick Massi (the sentimental Italian) and Bob Gaudio (pure genius and far sighted businessman). The four seasons who started off as the Four Lovers, to become Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons ultimately. 
The narration was crisp with the right touch of humour and wit. Nothing dark, shady or sad about it. The sombre moments were handled with an easiness. The lighting was perfect. The stage just transformed the whole theatre into the 60's and even me, a person who does not know the abc's of rock-n'roll travelled back to the era of handsome guys (no offence to this generation :P), Italian mafia, funny clothes (stripes and all yaa!!). 
The music and the dances were the essence of the play. Not at a single point did I feel out of sync. I think thats the best thing about plays, there s always something going on the stage. The energy these guys put up in making those 3 hours memorable, is commendable. I think thats why I have always been awed by my college theatre group. It must be a different world, performing to a full crowd and riveting them. I literally laughed, sang, tapped my feet, anticipated in anxiety as to what will happen next, as the show progressed. I enjoyed it more than a movie would not be an understatement although sounds a bit dramatic. 


Recently Ketaki wrote about how frustrated she was with movies (Hindi) in general. And I realized how much sense she was making, as I stood there transfixed and mesmerized, clapping till my hands ached, to the last performance of the Four Seasons. Why theatre remains so less explored is a mystery though. (I have figured out a few things but thats not what the blog is about, so lets leave it for a rainy day)


So that's my returning post! About the musical that moved me. So much, that I had to write about it :)
I hope and wish that at least those of you who are in the US, watch it.


Sharing one of my favourite tracks with you all. This Frankie Valli is one hell of a singer. Enjoy!





~nightflier!


P.S. Now lets move to the topic of your concern. Kindly lower those raised eyebrows for moving away from blogger without any notice or reason. I dont want you guys to understand my reasons, cos I know you understand ;) 
I think we lie to ourselves. On a daily basis. And I needed to do some serious introspection to find some answers. Well, the deep side of me had taken over. I was worried cos she never takes over unless its something to do with SRK. But anyways, now that I am back in blogville, I am sure you will re-welcome me with warm hugs and comments (convenient assumptions and more lies to myself ;)). And as to those who really missed me, thanks guys!  I appreciate it. I mean it! And for those who thought I had deleted the blog, how could you ???? BOOOOOOO ya!!! Its an integral part of me, and you just dont throw away your cell phone cos its old and out of fashion, but you upgrade it. A really bad example, but I know you have understood what I meant. Smart people you all are ;)

Under Seige - II

There could not be a better timing for the political move made with the confessions of Kasab.
(Here I assume that you all are not naive enough to believe that the confessions are just a result of thorough investigations! Most of us already know that these were unexpected!)

With Hillary Clinton's visit, this is the best time to put pressure on Pakistan, and make them act like a democratic country for a change to hand over the remaining suspects to us. It is like check-mate! Oh, I am so loving this. (Again I naively believe that, this time real ACTION will be taken!)

On a different note, if you have read/heard Kasab's statement it sounds so staged. I mean sometimes I can't properly remember what I did the day before. This man here has second to second account of that gruesome day, like it was written in a script and he was just playing his bit. I mean come on, get real dude! (the cops I mean.)

But overall I am relieved to hear this news, as 'lets be at peace with our neighbors' crap is over.
Sometimes being at peace is just not the right answer!

~nightflier

P.S. I did not know I had so strong feelings for Mumbai :)

money bound

I filed my returns for the fiscal year 2008-09. Both state and federal.

I hope that makes me a responsible person and tells the demon named recession that we are being good and sensible by helping the government. He better watch out his next move!!

OK  I know it sounds like a 7 year old's complaint to good old almighty. But if recession has plans to settle down then we better not make it feel like at home. With GM and chrysler also joining the bandwagon (on the verge more like) it feels like an end of an era. They never changed their thinking. May be we can. And by that I seriously don't know what I mean. :-/

Tax filing in India was not much of an overhead. The 2 years I worked there, my taxes were filed by a company appointed agent. I never cared about investing any money, even after mom's pursual. So my work used to be done in a matter of few hours. Here I attended workshops, went through the whole process of whys, how's and whens. I know I was careless in India, but here I was unusually attentive and sincere, interested in every single penny I earned. Strange, incidents are teaching me to be careful with money. Not that I was reckless but I never gave importance to it. These days I often find myself planning my finances, thinking ahead. Stranger...

Someone please take care of this bully. It's changing happy go lucky people like me. :-/ :-/

And my supervisor at library just waved at me. Reminds me I had come here to study :D Also reminds me that I used the precious lappy battery for blogger :-/

The girl in front of me looks super nice, she smiled at me and asked if I need any help. I did not give her any impression of being a novice though. :-/

The racks of books look inviting. So I am taking a plunge in the sea. 

laterzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

~nightflier :)

Recession time stories

So I was talking to this friend after a long time. Almost 4 months, the span in which she got married, changed her city, started a new life and a new job.

Now we both belong to that category of humans, who loved their first jobs (companies more than that). The same category of humans, who take offence if they hear anything bad, critical being said about their corporate Alma mater (ok, I take it more seriously!!).  Yeah, you can brand them as stupid school kids, who are very loyal to their believes. So much that we still follow the news feeds on our respective companies, she after changing her job and me after changing my priorities. 

Inside story, I know which bus routes have changed, from which parking lot the buses leave now, how the new employee center is not as good as the one at Mysore, how many H1-B visas have been issued in a particular unit, what the current hiring trend and rate is, and numerous shitty details. You can call me psychotic, if you wish :P

So we were discussing all these things when she started asking me about my career map. It's a cankerous topic. I go into cribbing mode almost instantly. And the other person is just short of banging his own head onto the wall (long distance calls help!).  And our discussion moved to the more obvious culprit 'recession'.

And we started talking about the phenomenon called 'corporate cost cutting'!!

1. Number of vending machines suddenly start disappearing. A month ago if your floor had 4 different types of coffee machines, now the whole floor sips the same old drab and cheapest coffee of the local vendor.

2. I have heard that some companies had stopped the use of paper towels as a means to cut costs.

3. Some bus routes are often changed or shortened or altogether closed.

4. Employees are encouraged to take meagerly paid sabbatical (!!!!$$$!!!!)

5. Well we all are aware, how performances (in time and out times) start getting monitored, once bad times strike.

6. Hiring rate slows down.

7. No more onsites. For indefinite period at least.

8. Salary hike looks like an illusion.

9. The bench/bay phenomenon increases beyond imagination. You are considered of the highest order if you still have fruitful work. By which I don't mean playing sudoku/solitaire or solving puzzles or reading blogs whole day.

10. All messengers suddenly get banned. How people still find out proxies is a different issue.

11. Dry spell hits the project parties and outings. These are the very in things in corporate world, which suddenly become "out" and waste of time and resources.

12. Insecurity creeps in the lives of many. Back up plans become a necessity.

And thus goes on the corporate saga. I am happy for all of them who have jobs and work. And for those who are having a tough time, hang in there people. Patience normally gets paid with the greatest of rewards. :)

~nightflier!

Quarantined !!!

The Slumdog Academy of Excellence

Read this for more.

After all the hype, criticism and accolades it has received, it's time for some action. Not only from the makers but "us" the civilized and 'happy in their own cocoon and reality' ones. If films are a mirror to our society, culture and sensitivities, then we as a society can do far better than just romanticizing the film for its fairytailish portrayal of poverty or criticizing the same depiction. 

P.S. Not giving into the 'so hot' debate about the movie was something very difficult to resist..at least after reading the above article.

P.P.S. Thanks pushkar for the link :P Post was looking good without this :P

A point here and there ..

2 days after the Mumbai horror, I am still reading a lot of stuff, a whole bunch of articles, surfing through news channels. I really don't hate anyone or any particular community for what happened, but I kind of hate that so many brave people lost their lives.

A really good and interesting artical here by Arun Shaorie, Rajya Sabha MP and someone who can be trusted with authentic information.

 http://www.indianexpress.com/news/surprised/392625/1

I have given direct link here. 

Came across Karan Johar's blog as well through Youthcurry. As a thinker he also puts a very good point. We need to make peace with ourselves, in our daily lives, with our dear ones to wish for outer peace.

Exactly, the thing which is coming in my mind since this incident 'What we achieve inwardly, will change outer reality'. If we all yearned for this, may be, one day the world will be a lot better place to live in, than it is right now! If each one of us, the tiniest speck of the larger picture, did this, may be we would be more peaceful.

As far as the political system and will is concerned, I don't care much. Actually they stopped mattering to me since those train blasts. I will go to the extent of saying that, I wonder how we even make stupid mistakes of electing them. I think we need a central system, reporting only to one responsible (not any home minister, of course!!) person and making all the decisions. It would be so cool to see those terrorists nabbed and may be then we can talk about human rights and all that jazz!! I think I will make them dance to Mithun tunes, to make it even harder for them. Get some sense into these overtly senseless people.

Is anyone game to teach them the lesson of their lives ?

Then, you so much have company mate.

Long live zindagi,

nightflier :)

Under siege ..

As the haunting images of terrified people and cold blooded murderers still float in my mind, I wonder what is happening to the world.

Mumbai is one city with which I have had hate-love relationship. A place which I never came to like since my childhood, had become one of my dream cities lately (It still is!!). As I grew up, my small townish mind understood its vicissitudes and started to respect the city even more. Especially South Mumbai with its historical monuments and serene surroundings (the coloba shore line near the Gateway) are my favorite places. I remember we had made fun of the Taj by visiting Louis Vuitton shop and commenting on the exorbitant (but of course !!) display of clothes. It is a city which I have loved to like despite it being super fast, crowded, cluttered, congested and what not. Because, it is a city which lets everyone their own hero, in their own way. It is a city which taught me that life gives everyone their share of chances. 

Well, I don't have any intention of romanticizing the city and its people and their resilience. I am still horrified. I know some place does not become really unsafe and unsuitable for survival because of such incidents. But I hate the fact that the big shots who supposedly make the calls, are asking people to show their spirits and resilience. If there is someone who needs to show their spirits, its the damned terrorists, who instead of studying at a university preparing for their final exams are on a rampage out there. And those who are brain washing and training these young, impressionable minds need to learn about resilience more than anyone else in the world. 

Oh, I know I sound hopelessly idealistic and childish, but I still believe in the better side of people. I know life will be normal in a few days as if nothing happened, because in the end the show has to go on and all that stuff, but that does not mean that we should be taken for granted. It's saddening that Mumbai's janta has been taken for granted time and ever again. Will this never end? Does it ring a bell that though others (read the authorities) are responsible for our security, they are being made a fool out of, by being caught off-guard? Last time it was the trains, this time the sea route, what next? 

These are questions from a person who values life. I can imagine how a normal mumbaikar who has to face all this must be feeling.

I wish the authorities a 'get well soon' and 'get into action' . I also wish Mumbai a quick recovery. It's a city of dreams and it will remain so. 

kung fu woman !!

How many of you ladies have felt unsafe out there, when u were walking/shopping/traveling alone, all on your own ?
This is a generalized question to everyone..i know it becomes a lot more tougher when you are out there alone, doing all your chores, in a big, bad world..predators are everywhere..but have you given any thought, that you can be victimized or made an easy prey, by the situation..

Well, if you haven't then, i will share this wonderful workshop (which i attended) details with you..i went to a 'self defense' workshop recently held on my campus..the need being just to have fun, get to know other females on campus and lastly learn self defense..
ironic, but the kind of protective environment i was brought up into, i never came across any creeps (read mentally ill/sick/psycho human beings)..and after growing up also, i either ignored lewd people around me, or was surrounded by male friends/peers, always letting them boast in the glory of being 'the protector' !! oh well, the need is still not there, but the whole notion of being in a foreign country and out of your comfort zone can be unsettling..so with this thought in the back of my mind, i went..and thank heavens i went :)

The instructor was a wonderful lady, Margarett, a social worker for an organisation 'Impact'.
To build up the session and involve us, she started off with personal experiences and the situations which all females have to face and handle. The basic idea was to tell that its in our hands to control situations and avoid extreme consequences.
I really cant give details of the exciting session (don't mind my volatile memory !) but want to share some of the tips which i think are really cool and handy !
so without relying on my amazing memory, further more, here you go..

1. Never ignore the inner instinct..Remember that a female's instincts tell her that something is wrong, way before it happens ! so don't think that, the other person cant harm you, cos if he doesn't then rightho! but if he does then .....
2. Use that voice of yours.. When someone invades your personal physical space knowingly, raise your voice..first politely, and then steadily being loud and clear..this tells other people around that someone's causing you trouble.. This also builds confidence :) I know being a woman, its are nature to be pleasant and warm and we are supposed to be spreading sunshine everywhere, but no point being the good one, when your being taken advantage of !!
3. Keep sharp things like keys handy, just in case..most of the times, assaults are never made, if you show (its very important to show that you feel like the queen of the world, and i know every woman somewhere loves being this !! :)) that your alert..but when you know that your not in a safe area, keep things handy..carry a pepper spray, keys should be handy in case you have to run to your vehicle, etc..
4. Mobile phones can come handy..in some cases just to pretend that your in touch with soemone..but only when you know that your safety zone is nearby.. Otherwise talking on a phone outside, blocks your attention and senses, so don't use it much :)
5. learn some kicking techniques from ur male friends/peers..i learnt some today, but don't really want to explain all that :D don't mind..but use your four limbs (2 hands and 2 legs) to the fullest..try to hit on softer parts of the body..anything from neck up and groin is right on spot ! These are extreme measures which we seldom require..but it helps building confidence..so learn it for the heck of it :)
6. Last and the most important, always try to be alert, don't block any of your senses..its always clever to be in your safety zone first :)

so on this note, be alert, be confident and listen to that instinct of yours :) its never wrong :)

nightflier (fellow woman) !

And for the indians here in amreeka, we came up with an amazing dish which comes very close to the chaat (a snack) we have back home :) buy the doritos/nacho/tacos, any flavor and dress them up with a salad topping of finely cut tomatoes,onions,cilantro (coriander :D),grapes, a pinch of salt, nimbu and sugar :) it tastes just heavenly :) try it and lemme know !!